Tuesday, October 14, 2008

Long time no post

Dang it I just can't get into the groove of this. Plus I vascillate between wanting others to read it and not wanting them too, especially because I vented so strongly in my first feldgling posts about my girl...so it's not like I will be sending her or anyone we know to the blog. Which is a bummer because if Iwant to morph it into something more public or generic I would have to go back and delete those posts. I guess that's doable but then those posts were the truth of those days just like this one is the truth of today. And I still get maniacly pissed at my girl all the time and would probably find myself posting about it in the future...hmmmm just not sure what to do.

In any event much of my attention lately has been on the upcoming election - 3weeks! - and the incredible amount of fucking up being committed by the McCain campaign. I wouldn't ever in a million years vote republican and I have been in Obama's corner for a long time. I think I am quite frankly stunned at what a colossal screw up McCain has shown himself to be as the election approaches. In picking Sarah Palin, the most uniquely unqualified VP candidate in history (sorry Dan Quayle, you've been replaced), in refusing to articulate any policy statements about anything, in inciting racism and fear at rallies and in wandering around like someone who forgot to take their Aracept during a debate. It's as though the universe has stacked the deck so high against McCain that there is no way that he can recvover. It'a about damn time too.

Other than that I have been trying to deal with my anger towards my parents as related to my mother's breast cancer and their usual self absorbed reaction to it. I have anger issues, it seems. Maybe I am more like McCain than I care to admit! I think I am trying to find a way to be OK with being angry. I don't want to become an angry person...but then I realize I am in many ways. So it's hard to strike a balance.

I am also more and more obsessed with wanting to take better care of myself and at the same time realizing that I am a pretty lazy person. I keep thinking that results will motivate me while at the same time not doing anything to create results.

I am so fucking human.